Have you ever been resistant to change?
What might have caused that resistance? What happened because of the resistance? What could you have missed out on if you hadn't been so resistant? What were you protected from by being resistant?
We all have our reasons for resisting. I am resistant when I'm afraid of the unknown. I'm also resistant when I'm afraid I might fail. Fear drives my resistance, and it has caused me to miss opportunities for growth in the past. However, sometimes my resistance is caused by my intuition or that "gut" feeling, which has protected me from making critical errors.
All humans, including coaching clients, have their own valid reasons for resistance. However, it's important to have strategies to overcome this resistance. Below are some helpful tips:
Remain calm and level-headed. This is the client's journey, and your job as a coach is to help guide not force.
Express empathy to the person, and take time to understand their perspective.
Reframe the resistance and practice presence to better understand the core of their resistance.
Be patient - if the client isn't ready to go there yet, forcing the issue will only cause increased resistance.
Decide if this is the right time for the relationship, and be upfront with the client about next steps and expectations.
Hopefully the first four steps will lead to the desired outcome and will help you avoid step 5. No matter what, recognizing and addressing resistance will help you be a better coach regardless of outcome.
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